Lackawanna Blues

The power of Khia compels you.

My sugar just shot through the roof!

Deep in the bowels of Alabama, Antoine LIVES and TWIRLS.  It's not his red scarf or his yellow smoker's teeth that sends my kidneys on a joyride for Jesus.  It's the Negro expertise with which he narrates the story that gives me flashbacks of slavery.  Harriet Tubman would get her life.

While I'm over here getting my insulin fix and reading a Psalm, get into the fuckery:

When People Don't See What I See

 Eddie Munster and Drake: Separated at Birth?

I'm just saying.

Praise Jesus.

Stop the Dumbness

Chris Brown on the set of Precious.

The worse thing about Chris Brown ain't that he wore Rihanna's ass out. It's that he's about as smart as a can of Old English.

This motherfucking grown ass man didn't know what the census was. Oh, so you can sing and dance and punch Caribbean girls in the forehead, but you can't open a letter and read what it says?

Where are the parents, Jehovah? Why come they let this boy have an interview knowing he ain't got the sense You gave him?

Oh, Miss Brown. I'ma pray for you (that's Christian for "I think you're an asshole").

Cheeseburgers for Jesus

Church sissies is singing hymns for McDonald's and y'all mad at me?  Shit.

I wonder if Jesus likes Happy Meals.

Gunkified.

Cunts Can Get Life Too!

I have only one word: Yassssssssssssssssssssssss!

Jesus Walks, Honey

 

What would you do for a Klondike Bar?

Miss Donitra McClurkin is vury mad at all the LGBTQ kids for not renouncing they dildos, strap-ons, and midnight booty-shot rendezvous for a quick prayer meeting at C.O.G.I.C. (aka Chile, Old Girls Is Crazy).   She wants you to know that Jesus can help you overcome your same-sex desires.  Too bad Jesus can't make a bitch stop lying, though.  Donitra knows she be gettin' that pussy turnt out every chance she gets.  Talking 'bout just because she's on a diet don't mean she don't wanna eat.  Tramp, please.  Just because you got up in front of a stadium full of Christian homophobes and put on Holy Ghost Stunts and Shows don't mean you ain't sucking dick like a Hoover and gettin' that ass pumped like gas!

Your slip is showing, Miss One. What did Miss Kanye say?  Jesus Walks...for the gods, baby. You better get into it.

Yup.  That's right.  You just been gunkified.

Goblins Are Running Rampant!

 Separated at birth? Sandra Rose (top) and a random pig.

Y'all ever see a photo of this Obama-hating whore named Sandra Rose? Chile, never in a trillion years have I ever seen a tramp as ugly as this one. Now I see why she be on her blog hatin' 24/7. That bitch got a ugly complex.  Lashin' out at pretty folks because her face genes are defective.  And it ain't kuz she darkskinned.  This hoe is just plain ugly irregardless of the color of her complexion. 

Fuck a rose! They should call her Sandra Snapdragon. Y'all heard it here first.

Good mernting!  I'm Skrawberry Gunk and Sandra Rose has just been gunkified.