Zoop!

My nipples and my bellybutton are in the same place, and what?

Finally, a honest fat person. Praise Jesus.

My, My, My, the Devil is a Liar!

(Put on your red dress, Miss Thang!)

Baby, you ain't gotta lie.

Erybody and they mother know you gay. I mean, it's common knowledge. You can sit up there until all the mascara disappears from your face and you ain't gone be nothing but gay. You AND Eddie Murphy. I don't care how many kids you got. Homosexuals make babies too!

I don't care what nobody say. Ain't no man that damn feminine unless he gettin poked in the booty. Let's just put the shit on out there. Praise the lawd.

I can already hear the children gettin mad at Skrawberry: "It ain't none of your got damn business what Johnny Gill do!" "I hate when people try to out somebody!" "Why you worried about Johnny?" "It's people like you that make the world hate gay people!"

Here's my early response: so, because, and too damn bad. Y'all queens always finna shoot the messenger. Y'all doing too much. Y'all best sit down and shut up before you get your wig snatched lovely.

Or before you get gunkified.

For your viewing pleasure, Miss Jonetta Gill:

For Hip Hop News & Entertainment at DimeWars.Com

Stop the Dumbness

Chris Brown on the set of Precious.

The worse thing about Chris Brown ain't that he wore Rihanna's ass out. It's that he's about as smart as a can of Old English.

This motherfucking grown ass man didn't know what the census was. Oh, so you can sing and dance and punch Caribbean girls in the forehead, but you can't open a letter and read what it says?

Where are the parents, Jehovah? Why come they let this boy have an interview knowing he ain't got the sense You gave him?

Oh, Miss Brown. I'ma pray for you (that's Christian for "I think you're an asshole").

Baby Fat

No bitch, I'm hungry!

Get you a piece of this video here. This F.I.T. (Faggot in Training) is getting life with a banana and a Lady Gaga song, Mickey Moused down. Apparently, cunts come in all ages, shapes, and sizes.

How your baby's belly that big and he's not even 10 yet? Underoos all stretched out and what not. Lawd ha' mercy. How much you wanna bet the person holding the camera is a biggun too?

Ooh, that made me chuckle.

Y'all say I'm harsh on the fat children. I say stop eatin.

Y'all say I'm mean. I say y'all gunkified.

Calorie Queens

Fat people make me sick.

I know you supposed to be proud of who you are and all that, but let's face facts:

1. You're big as a duplex.
2. Thighs ain't supposed to have dimples.
3. Men ain't supposed to have titties.
4. Fat people have a greater risk for heart disease, diabetes, high blood pressure, and gingivitis.
5. Spandex wasn't made for you.
6. I hate when you eat up all the food.
7. You sweat too damn much.
8. That cheesy substance between the folds of your ass, groin, breast, neck, and armpit areas? That's not supposed to be there.
9. I don't have the time or strength to lift your belly to find your microscopic penis.
10. One chin is enough.

Ya'll got me speaking in tongues.  Gunkified.

For Colored Boys Who Considered Suicide When a Sex Change Wasn't Enuff

The power of Christ compels you!

Nuh uh, Pazuzu. I will not let you take this here child. Not until I can take a kiddie perm to his peasy head. And not until Jesus Power helps me rip those leotards off his legs.

This is what happens when you let Rihanna, Beyonce, Ne-Yo, and Trey Songz raise your kids for you: dicks turn into pussies and trollops are born.

I got a bible and a hot comb.  One of these is gonna work.