How Dare She!

 

Where the fuck is my stylist?

Oh, mighty Isis!  Please protect me from the bonafide fuckery the children insist on putting me through.  I prays and I prays and still I cain't be free from this deviltry.

Lawd, why come fat people always wanna wear the wrong stuff?  I mean, for serious.  If y'all know y'alls feet is wide as highways, why you tryna squeeze into some side streets?

Look at Gabourey Sidibe.  This heffa is bout as big as a gaggle of hamhocks.  And yet, here her is tryna put she hooves in some juicy couture shoes.  For realz?  Straps, darling?  It should be illegal for that much weight to be on a damn heel.  If only her pinky toe could suck its teeth. And lotion is fundamental.

I'm through.



Yep.  You know it.  Gunkified.